Saturday, 7 May 2016

Mother's Day Special: My Extra Ordinary Mum

The only unconditional love that knows no limits or boundaries is a mother’s love. No matter how or what we do, we can never thank a mother for all the things she does for us. I will not even attempt to thank my mother in this post for teaching me everything that I know today. I just wanted to highlight some things that I learned from her unconsciously (or consciously). Things she taught me not just as a mother but as a person that she is. In recent years, in countless moments, I have come across situations where I surprised myself with my own reactions. I am grateful yet amazed at how perfectly God has planned my life that I always have my mother’s example in some form or the other to find solutions in every phase of life.

When I was young and trying to understand life, she introduced me to the Love of God.

A mother's lap is the first school. It is where you not only understand the basics of life but you are also introduced to religion. Everyone has a different way of understanding and practising religion. Some do it out of love and some out of fear. My mother did not instil fear in my heart. She was never imposing. Her faith and belief was an example for me to follow. What she did was to make me notice His mercy and LOVE before His anger. So while others pinpointed things that were wrong with how I practised my religion, my mum always focused on what I did right. This created a huge difference. When I was young and had learned to pray, I found it hard to concentrate during prayers. I offered prayers as fast as I could. She did not tell me to slow down. She told me to be regular and just keep praying. She always told me that God is forgiving and that He will find a way to forgive your sins before He decides to punish.

Whenever I imagine God with His love seventy times more than my mother’s (as He promises), a strange comfort envelopes me. My mother laid the very foundation of this faith in my heart. This faith in His love is empowering. You know the assurance when you know someone’s got your back because you believe they love you, gives you the courage to face whatever may come. You do things with honesty and do not crave the approval of others. 

I think that when you fear someone you hide, manipulate and try to look for justifications. When you are loved and you love - you don't need a mask ...You are what you are!  

During the awkward and confusing growing up years, she taught me
No Self Pity 

No matter how tough things got, my mother never hopped on the self-pity train. She has seen some really tough times and has made some really tough choices in life. She regrets certain decisions but she doesn’t use those to develop emotional bonds and connections with people. She doesn’t crave acceptance and affection of others just to feel better. In a way, long before Elsa, she sang 'Let It Go' for me. Though I understood a little bit of it thankfully I did. I say a little bit because I do feel down and demotivated sometimes and update sad, poetic (lame) statuses on Facebook but I do not exaggerate my issues and promote them to collect flocks of supporters. Honestly. 

Thanks to my mum, I have learned to take responsibility for my actions instead of playing the self-victimization game.

When I got married, her Love for Imperfection helped me to build a strong bond with my hubby. 

My parents' love story is not only the most beautiful love story I know but the most inspiring too. No, it was not a fairy tale. It was not a perfect love story also. In fact, it was far from perfect. But it survived all kinds of tests that life threw at them. My parents saw many good days and many bad days and some really bad days. They stood by each other like two married people should. They resolved their issues without ever involving a third person. They supported each other against their families when needed. My mum loved my dad with all his flaws and so did he. I have never seen her throwing tantrums or complaining about him. My mum's acceptance of those flaws, that imperfect life, those hardships; her untiring love and the way she honoured my father, taught me to love and respect my husband. You ask her about her past today and she will reminisce about the good days as if the bad days never existed. She embraced life's imperfections perfectly. A lesson that has made me choose happiness over needs and love over selfish desires.  

She taught me to Keep Learning

Knitted Teddybears 
For her, age is a number when it comes to learning new things. She loves taking up new hobbies and is always looking for things to do. Be it cooking experiments or knitting projects. She is a pro user of Facebook and had a blog of her own as soon as she retired from work. She knits, cooks sew and writes.  Recently, she wrote a series of General Knowledge books and is now is working on another project. When the first time I sent her a smartphone, I told her that after she has received it, I will call her and explain how to use WhatsApp and Viber. But in a few hours after she had received the phone before I could call her, I had received two ‘test messages’; one on WhatsApp and one on Viber. Now she knows how to take selfies ;) She is well versed and well read about almost everything. Even though she worked in the education sector all her life but she can give you the best advice about your career in the corporate sector. When she comes and lives with me for a month or two, all broken things around the house are fixed, torn curtains are stitched, spots and stains are gone and something new added in the house that would make my life easy. If today I decided to pick up ANY hobby, she will cheer for me.

She will be the first one to read this too! 
Books are written by her - published by OUP
And no matter what happens, she taught me to Enjoy Life

You need to learn from her how to make most of every situation whether good or bad. She can surprise you with the type of daring things she does. She travels alone from one continent to another. We dance at our little achievements and cry over sad movies. One day she'd be reading a philosophical book and another day humming a cheesy Bollywood song. She loves watching movies of Salman Khan (Bollywood actor) and thinks it is really unfair that he never gets the girl (not even in the movies). She cannot control her laughter when my nephew says something silly. Her grandchildren know who in the whole family will laugh with them at their mischief. We all know now that she is the one who ate all our chocolates when they mysteriously disappeared from our hideouts. Today, whenever we pass by a dessert shop she winks at me, signalling that one piece of chocolate cake doesn’t do any harm (actually it really doesn't)

She wrote an article about herself some time ago titled “A Bouncy Baby in a Sixty Year Old Me” which is true to the core. You can read it here

Thank you, God for making mothers. For letting us know how to measure your love. 
Wishing all mothers a very Happy Mothers Day today, a healthy life, happiness and contentment forever. Ameen. 

  I Love you, Amma <3


  1. Love you darling, I believe I am the first one to read it, thankyou for this precious gift on Mother's Day

  2. Beautifully expressed. She looks a strong lady. You are so lucky to have her in your life.

  3. Beautifully expressed. May Allah give her a long and healthy life.

  4. I love the first part about love of God. I hope I should do the same for my son. Thank you and I love the teddy bears!

  5. Thanks Sherry Collum for dropping by1

  6. Totally loved reading this post. Your mum is so lucky to call you her daughter. Give my regards to her.

    Fatima |

  7. Thanks Fatima! I think I am more blessed to have her as my mother! Thanks for reading!

  8. What a beautiful post! I loved reading it. Not having a mother for the last 25years, Mothers Day was always blocked and reading posts like yours makes me cherish the time I did have with her, even moreso than before.
    Thank you for such a warming post and best wishes for you and your mum. You're very lucky to have each other :)